The foundation
Talking things through, understanding the patterns you keep falling into, and healing what sits underneath, like trauma, PTSD, and attachment wounds.
Meet our clinicians
Alira Couples Center
Couples therapy for how both of you are wired.
Every kind of mind, with or without a label. In person or by video.
When every talk turns into the same fight, or you feel alone in your own home, we can help you find your way back to each other.
Where are you starting from?
Not sure where to start? Talk with Emilyor take the relationship self-test ↗
We get it.
Maybe every conversation ends in the same argument. Maybe one of you shuts down while the other pushes harder. Maybe you love each other and still feel lonely.
If you’re here, you might be tired, and a little afraid it can’t get better. Most of the couples we see felt the same way when they first reached out.
You don’t have to figure this out alone. We’ll help you understand each other again, with practical tools you can start using right away.
Everything good couples therapy offers, plus ISM, the Island of Shared Meaning
ISM on top
Our communication method, built on the tradition of Nonviolent Communication, gives every kind of mind a shared structure, so each of you feels respected, acknowledged, and validated. It works best once you are both calm, intentional, and committed, and we help you get there first.
Learn about ISMProgress you can see
Between sessions, you log your successes and stumbles in the ISM app with one button, and your therapist reviews them with you, so you both see what is working and where you get stuck.
About the ISM appMeet our couples specialists
Warm, experienced clinicians who help couples of every kind of mind find their way back to each other.
Dr. Thomas Lucking, PhD, LMFTCreator of the ISM method · neurodiverse couplesStephanie Salas, MA, LMFTNeurodiverse relationships and AutismRoss MacPhee, MA, AMFTCouples counseling and family conflict
Christopher Underwood, MA, LMFTCouples EMDR and traumaNina Whang, AMFTCouples, attachment, and boundariesChristine Ibarra, MA, LMFTCouples and families, including Autism
Shannon Kelly, MA, LMFTCouples and veterans in transition
Roxane Williams, MA, MSW, LCSWSex therapy, LGBTQIA+, and open relationships
Brage Garofalo, MA, AMFTCouples, trauma, and PTSD, including veteransSee all couples cliniciansFilter by office, or let Emily match youWe struggled for years with therapists that didn’t understand Asperger’s… it is only now that we are getting traction and rebuilding our relationship.
Not sure? We’ll help you understand how each of you is wired.
You don’t need a diagnosis or a label to work with us. If you want answers, a free self-check or a doctoral-level assessment can bring clarity. If you don’t, we simply work with how each of you thinks.
The focus of a specialist, the depth of a large practice
Life rarely brings one challenge at a time. If anxiety, trauma, or questions about ADHD come up along the way, you won’t have to start over somewhere new. The Center is part of Alira Family Therapy: about 40 clinicians, doctoral-level assessments, and offices across California.
Often helpful alongside couples work
Explore all our services →Common questions.
Yes, and you are far from alone. Neurodiverse couples are one of our specialties. We help each of you understand how the other’s brain works, so it stops feeling personal, and use the ISM method to bridge the gap. See neurodiverse couples.
Island of Shared Meaning (ISM) is a communication model created by Dr. Thomas Lucking. It builds on Nonviolent Communication and adds structure so both partners feel respected, acknowledged, and validated. The ISM app lets you keep practicing between sessions. Learn about ISM.
Yes. Therapy is for people in California, where our clinicians are licensed. Wherever else you live, we can work with you through coaching by video, which focuses on communication, skills, and goals rather than diagnosing or treating a mental health condition. Talk with Emily to find the right fit.
TriWest care for veterans and the military community is currently provided through our affiliated practice, Therapy InMotion, while our contract transitions to Alira. For other plans we provide superbills for out-of-network reimbursement. See fees & insurance.
We are not an emergency service. Call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, free and available 24/7. If someone is in immediate danger, call 911.
Looking for help as a parent or family? See parenting and family support
You don’t have to do this alone.
Tell us what’s going on, in your own words. We’ll listen, and help you find the right person to work with, in person or by video.
Hi, I’m Emily
Reaching out can feel like a big step, so let’s make it an easy one. Tell me a little about your challenges, and I’ll help you find the clinician who fits you best. No pressure, no judgment, just a friendly conversation.
I can’t wait to meet you!
EmilyEmily Brown, Client Care Coordinator